The Rules of the Chef


Staff member
Joined Oct 7, 2001
I found this very amusing and wanted to share it with everyone. It was found on the bulletin board of the chef's office aboard the Queen Elizabeth II, and published in "Lang's Compendium of Culinary Nonsense and Trivia" copyright 1980.

1. The Chef is right
2. The Chef is always right
3. The Chef does not sleep, he rests.
4. The Chef doesn't eat, he nourishes himself.
5. The Chef doesn't drink, he tastes
6. The Chef is never late, he is delayed.
7. The Chef never leaves the service, he is called away.
8. If you enter the Chef's office with your own idea, you leave with his.
9. The Chef doesn't have a relationship with his secretary, he educates her.
10. It is forbidden for Chefs to marry in order that their numbers shouldn't increase.
11. The Chef is always the Chef, even in his swimming costume.
12. If you criticize the Chef, you criticize the Almighty.

Hope you find this as amusing as I did!
Joined Feb 21, 2001
I've seen another one stuck in there about number 3, "In case of misunderstanding, refer to rule 2." or something.
Joined Feb 11, 2002
Good one Pete!
This is exactly what my Chef was like in school! He was old school Austrian, and so overextended in every area of his life that all these rules applied to him on an hourly basis. If you were called into his office at a certain time of day, you would invariably find him sleeping with his eyes open, but kind of rolled back into his head, sitting upright in his chair. He alwasys insisted he was fully awake and waiting for your answer! (And the answer was always..."Right Chef!):lol:
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