i tell yall i am so glad there is an area in here where we can discuss things other than our "foodieism". i personaly am a big guy and have been told all my life that for this reason i am supposed to lok out for everyone else. so if this is the truth why is it that whenever i try to do so i either get into trouble with the law or some of my "freinds". for this reason and others wich need not be discussed in this rambling my heart is handed to me on a silver platter well garnished and acominoning an ice sculptere ladent with caviar in a party that is made for everyone but me. so why is it that this occurs is there anyone out there that feels the way i do. am i alone in this world because of the way i was raised? i feel that in the past 2 years in wich i have come to embrace my calling to the cullinary arts industry whole heartedly i have given every bit of emotion i have left to the buisness. i feel as though if i were to give any more i would simply go mad and if i were to give any less i would waste the sacrifices of all of those who came before me. please if anyone reads this keep in mind that i think i have fallen into the stereo typical role of the chef who must consume a case of beer a niight just to maintain his or her composer in the kitchen. please if anyone reads this disregard what you have read and please dont let this rambling affect the way you feel about this feild. i have to admit that if the world were to end tomarrow i feel as though i have made the right carrer choice because of the way i feel about making people happy. please forgive me for posting this endless rambling which i ingested too much bud light to complete but i just needed to get some sh*&^ off of my chest and i thought that some of my fellow cooks might understand. thanks guys for being there for me. for listening to me when everyone else has gone home. i love this forum guys! yall are the best!!!!